Thursday, October 04, 2012

My Wife and I on Jet Blue

I was just fuming walking down the aisle toward my seat on a Jet Airways flight to New York when a white flight attendant flashed me a work-friendly smile and said hello.

"What is your seat allocation?" she asked.

"Not the one I selected online," I replied with annoyance written all over my grill despite knowing full well that a man who looks like me should not be anything but subdued on planes in the belly of the beast.

"Why what happened? she asked looking down the aisle in front of me.

"I selected an aisle seat and the ticket agent changed my allocation with a new boarding pass when I checked my bags.  And I just found out now.  One would think that taking time out to go online and select a seat and print a boarding pass would be enough.  I mean why offer the online service if Jet Blue will just do as it pleases anyway?" I complained.

She looked at my re-issued boarding pass and confirmed that I was indeed sitting in the middle seat which I absolutely hate; I always sit on the aisle or I don't fly.

"We have a full flight tonight.  Which seat is your wife sitting in?  Can you change with her, perhaps?" she asked in a tone to help calm my visible agitation.

"Huh?  My wife?

"Yes your wife," she said and pointed toward a brown sista a few feet in front of me.

"She is not my wife lady.  Sometimes brown people show up in public and elsewhere randomly and often they don't even know each other.  In fact most brown people don't know each other," I said in a quiet voice to hide my growing disdain.

"Oh sorry I thought she was your wife," she said as I walked off with a pressed smile.

Turns out that the Big Tao worked in my favor and I ended up sitting in-between a married couple who offered me the aisle seat so they could snuggle for five hours non-stop.

I was happy.

Well not entirely 'cause I hate public displays of affection.  Just riles my ass at times and especially when ugly ass genes are part of the equation.

Sorry for the rant but I am getting back into the Mzansi downswing.


Ps. See this article: "Wanna Get Away From Romney or Obama’s America? JetBlue Will Evacuate You" (October 3, Truthdig).

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