Saturday, August 13, 2011

An Ox and a Moron

My boy Tony (Herman) made me realize that there is really no such thing as a "purebred boerbol" dog.  My worry that some street cojone has defiled my Leah's pure genetics is, well ... moronic.

Moms bought Leah seven years ago from a registered breeder when I was still living in Portland.  It was at a time when there was a spate of house burglaries that a family friend recommended the breed for its watchdog capabilities.

Seven years later we love the Ox more than we could have imagined and when I look at what it costs to keep her fed for a month I think she may be the real burglar.

The truth is that folks are scared of her sheer size.  She is vigilant, well between meals.  Still, the breed is an amalgamation of bulldog, bull terrier, boxer, and who knows what.  It is a dog bred primarily for guarding mines and the name boerbol is an Afrikaner derived label that means farmer's (boer) bull.

If you make your way to the local SPCA you will be saddened by the number of these dogs that are discarded or given up because folks can't afford to keep them.

AnyHowze back to Tony who is the genius among the Kimberley bras from back in the day.  He got me thinking that my assertion that Leah was a "purebred boerbol" was in essence an oxymoron (incongruous and contradictory term).

So, given that I am chief among the moron clan I have decided to make an oxymoron list (in no particular order) and invite you to add your additions (ummm that would not be an oxymoron, no?  A redundancy, maybe? :0)

Whatever ne, here goes:

1. She is an advanced beginner. 2. She has two adult children.
3. Post-apartheid. 4. Abundant poverty. 5. American culture.
6. Birth control. 7. Ethnic blacks/whites.  8. He is in the majority minority.
9. Obama is consistently inconsistent.
10. Every scientific study must have a constant variable.
11. Certain risk. 12. Controlled chaos. 13. World music.
14. Completely destroyed.  15. Current history. 16. Daily special.
17. Detailed summary. 18. Dry ice.  9. Dry wine. 20. Different pattern.
21. Doubting believers. 22. Doing nothing.  23. Deliberate mistake.
24. Forgotten memories. 25. Found missing.
26. The US is fighting for peace. 27. Free with purchase.
28. Ridwan uses graphic language. 29. They are a group of individuals.
30. Giant dwarf.  31. Half dead. 32. Honest thief. 33. Halfway done.
34. Almost true. 35. False reality.  36. Huge shortage.
37. Hyundai Excel (sorry Tony :0) 38. Hollow point.
39. Happily married. 40. Insane logic. 41. Lower inflation.
42. Obama is a liberal conservative. 43. Living fossil.
44. She is skinny fat.  45. Married life. 46. Marital bliss.
47. Near future. 48. I'm doing nothing much.
49. Old news. 50. Plastic glasses.

And my current favorite from a news report: "It would be so much better if London had experienced a peaceful riot."

So, it would be awfully nice if you added a few to the list.


Ps: Oh Tony do you remember in the eighties when the bras used to say: "she is kak pretty"?

OK OK ... I'm out.  I do so have a love-hate relationship with blogging ... :0)

Update (August 15): These just in from Tony.
*. Friendly fire.
*. Plug it out.
*. House music.
*. Pretty dangerous.

She was kak pretty and I was kak naar when one of the bras got to her before I did.

White that ABBA??

Tony I watched MotorGP yesterday for the first time in a very long time.  I feel sick.  I won't even mention that the sickness started somewhere on Saturday evening watching your new country make the Bokke look like the William Pescod High 15.

It was pretty ugly!  ;0)


Update (August 16): This blog (ummm that would be me ;) wishes bra Tony a happy birthday today.  Damn boet how many birthdays have you had away from this kak country of ours?

Just jiving boet.  I'm sure your moms and pops would love you to be home today so they can see whether you can blow all those damn candles out with just one breath ;0) 

Do they even make a cake big enough for all that ... ?

Yo boet we not getting old.  Naaa ... but I know a few of the bras from back in the day who are old already.

Peace Tony ... and may you always be blessed with happiness and peace.  I'd add strippers and Thai massages but then you getroud! ;0)



Kweli said...

My favs: happily married and world music. Someone at some party always says s/he listens to world music. At which point I get a facial twitch.

Ridwan said...

Kweli it was in Portland that I first noticed the category "World Music".

I even used the term in my Racism classes to point at the lunacy of creating Otherness.

I also pointed to CostPlus stores. You know there is one on Broadway where you can go and buy "authentic reproductions" ;) of African or Asian artifacts and put them in your apartment to look like you hip and multicultural and stuff.

It's a world gone whack my brother.

I guess another oxymoron could be 'white soul music', no?

Trust you having a great weekend chief.


Tony said...

*. Friendly fire.
*. Plug it out.
*. House music.
*. Pretty dangerous.

She was kak pretty and I was kak naar when one of the bras got to her before I did.

White that ABBA??


Ridwan said...

Thanks bra Tony!

These are excellent.



Ridwan said...

Oh Tony I forgot to tell you Michael Bolton is in the country singing with a host of black women - he is "authenticating his soul" according to some accounts!!

Guess all that stealing of black soul artists work is not enough.

He is also campaigning to stop violence against women here. OK, a good cause but why must some cracka always be aiming at those kind of denominators?

Just recently any white foreigner in SA was mostly likely working on this or that AIDS/HIV prevention strategy.

What happened? Is it not cool anymore to sit in coffee shops in Portland and New York and pontificate on how to stop the natives from f*cking themselves to death?

HowCome some bruthaz don't go to the US and work on genital mutilation issues there - they could start in Hollywood and protest against white women who enlarge their breasts? ;0)

I wonder if Jonathan Butler can't write a song entitled "leave your titties that size cause a handful is more than enough"?

I'd buy that CD and even an extra copy for charity.

Brothers could start a charity called "Black Artists Against Breast Enlargement Among Oppressed White American Women."

Seriaz ... yo now watch folks call me a sorta-Muslim misogynist.

Be good boet,